Convergent
by Elena Anselle
Summary: This is the story after Allegiant. A month after Tris dies, the Bureau develops a serum that erases three months of a person's memory. It's set on everyone in the Chicago experiment, while Four, Christina, and Cara are still outside the fence. Four may never love again. Until. During initiation, first jumper is an Erudite girl. She seems, different. And she is. Is it meant to be?
1. Chapter 1

Chapter 1

I wait by the net. It's been enough time since Tris's death that I can move and think without her, but it still hurts.

Lauren looks at me. "Which faction?" she asks. I know what he means. Which faction will the jumper have originated from. Besides Tris, it's always been a Dauntless. They're born and raised to be brave, so when they're told to jump, they jump.

As I'm about to answer, I hear the sound of a body hitting a net after a screech of, "Cannon ball!" With a snap, a blue figure rolls off the net, without help from anyone. She looks up. Her brown hair is in a short ponytail. She's an Erudite, transferred to Dauntless. She looks at me expectantly.

"What's your name?" I say, hoping to sound more masculine then surprised. She's not Dauntless. Yet she jumped first, like Tris. Maybe...

Stupid, a voice in my head tells me, and I know that it's right. Tris was one of a kind, and gone forever. She's probably just some girl who read about Dauntless initiation.

She smiles. "I'm Elena," she says without hesitation. Maybe she's just meant to be Dauntless. She's not scared of me, not scared of the unknown initiation, like most Erudite would. Maybe she is special.

"First jumper, Elena!" I say. Cheers rise through out the Dauntless crowd, congratulating the Erudite initiate that possesses bravery. I turn to congratulate her, but she says, "I think he needs help," pointing at the net, where a Dauntless born named Wayne struggles to get up.

When Wayne can catch his breath, he says, "I was going to jump first, but the Nose over there pushed me and said, 'Move it, Bozo. This is my time to shine!'" At that Elena sticks her tongue out and smiles, like a seven year old. That's when I knew:

Elena was special.


	2. Chapter 2

Chapter 2:

Once each initiate had jumped and the Dauntless norms had left, I turned to face my initiates. I have them my normal speech. "Usually I work in the control room," I say, scanning the c small clutter of initiates for familiar faces, and seeing none. "But for the time being, I will be your initiation instructor. My name is Four." I turn away, and hear a snicker. When I turn to confront the laugher, I am surprised to see it's Elena.

"What kind of name is that?" She asks. There's always an initiate who questions my name and my authority, and I smother them. I walk up to Elena.

"What is your name," I ask as coldly as I can manage. Elena doesn't shrink up. She straightens, drawing herself to her full height, challenging me.

"I thought you already asked me that," she says. "I'm Elena."

I'm dumbstruck. No initiate has done this, and I never thought one would. I try to retort. "You will soon learn from me to be careful what you say, and to shut up. Got it?" I really get up in her face, expecting her to shrivel up or cower.

Elena looks me in the eye. "Good luck with that. I say what I want, when I want. And I may not be Dauntless yet, but I'm still not afraid of your power and authority."

"You do NOT talk back to your superiors," I snap, hoping to end the conversation. I'm terrible at this, and she's looking me right in the eye.

"No," Elena says. "I'll talk when I wanna talk. And I'll say what I wanna say!" She then glares at me, her wide brown eyes focusing on my blue ones.

I'm glaring at her when an Amity snaps me back to reality. "You were saying?" she says impatiently.

I turn towards the Amity girl. "Right. I will show you the Chasm, the dorms, the Pit, and then we will eat," I say, and turn away quickly before Elena makes any smart remarks. This will be a long year.

Five Candor, three Erudite, one Amity, and, surprisingly, an Abnegation of the name Laura. Although, judging from her intelligence and body shape, she is no Tris, and she will not make it past initiation. I have to do my best, though. Stiffs have to help each other, like they're taught from birth.

When it's finally time to eat, I sit down an grab a hamburger. I'm about to take a bite when I hear laughs behind me. When I turn, Elena bad that Amity named Abbey are sitting side by side, next to me. I could hear their conversation.

"Okay, I'm getting a tattoo next," says Elena. Next? I look at Abbey, and she's got Dauntless flames on her arm. "But," Elena promised, "Mine will be on my cheek. If you got it, flaunt it, Abbey."

Abbey laughs as they discuss what Elena's tattoo should be.

Then Raina walks in, and everyone goes quiet. She smirks, and heads over to our table. Abbey's eyes widen, but Elena remains indifferent.

Raina is the new Dauntless Leader, as I refused, and Eric is dead. She's eighteen, and as cold and cruel as Eric himself. She always wears her sleek black hair back, and I can tell that she loathes me. I still don't know why.

"Well, Four," Raina says, as I try to avoid eye contact. "Won't you introduce me to your little friends?"

"They aren't my friends," I say. Elena makes an over dramatic surprised face, which makes Abbey laugh, then immediately shut up. Raina stares hard at me, and I sigh. "Fine. This is Abbey, the Amity, and this is Elena, the loudmouth."

Raina focuses her glare on Elena. Before she can say anything, Elena laughs. "If you don't want people asking," she says to me. "Why is your name Four?" Raina looks amused. She cocks her head, eager for my explanation that she knows will never come.

"Why do you ask so many questions?" I ask Elena. Usually I have a problem with Candor, and sometimes Erudite, asking questions. But this, this was unheard of. I've never had an initiate so bold toward me.

Elena's eyes bored into me. "Why is your name Four? How old are you? What faction were you originally from? Why did you just ask me a question? I ask questions, Four, because I was born into Erudite, so I seek facts and knowledge. Why did you think?"

I am about to answer when Abbey does it for me. "Why don't we just move. That way Four can enjoy his hamburger, and you can get a week into initiation before acquiring a mortal enemy." She then leads Elena away to another table, with the other initiates, giving me peace and quiet.

I try to eat my burger in peace, when Zeke and Shauna slide in from either side of me, grinning. Shauna's walking again, thanks to the Bureau's leg braces. Zeke is happy again. A year send to be the approximate time needed to be cured of depression after a close loved one is killed.

Zeke smiles. "Hey, Four," he says, punching my shoulder. He and Shauna are the only Dauntless I can really relax with, and they know it. "Got your eye on any initiates this year? I like Marissa from Dauntless, Ava from Dauntless, Elena from Erudite, Carrie from Dauntless..."

It kept going on like that. The only name that stood out was Elena. Apparently he likes girls that don't care about their safety, or anyone around them. Then again, that's what most Dauntless are like.

So, Zeke was droning on about hot initiates, Shauna was interjecting every so often, and I caught Elena sneaking a glance at me, and containing laughter at my uncomfortability. That's pretty much how the night went, until I finally crashed at my apartment, falling asleep as my head hits the pillow.

That night, I dream that Elena is Tris, and that we live our fairy tale happily ever after.


	3. Chapter 3

Chapter 3:

The next morning when I wake up, I get ready in monotone. Another day of initiates, another day of training ungrateful kids. Yes, maybe I have become meaner since Tris's death, but it's normal. Last year, I snarled at the initiates, yelled more, and they listened out of fear alone. I know that this year must be different.

I arrive at the training room ten minutes early, surprised to see Elena there, beating the crap out of a punching bag. I eye her skinny arms, knowing that she'll never win with that strategy. Then, she stops. Instead of turning to face me, she uses her elbows and knees to hit the bag. The same strategy I showed Tris. I walk up to her.

"You may have strategy," I say. "But you'll need a hell of a lot more to win. I suggest muscle." It's true. Tris almost didn't make it because the strategy wasn't enough; she needed the muscle that she lacked then but gained later.

Elena faces me. "I can get the bag off its chain," she says. I raise an eyebrow at her. She narrows her eyes. "Watch and learn, Four."

She faces the bag again. She does a series of punches, loosening up the bag. Then, she eyes me, and unhooks the bag from its chain. It lands, with a heavy thud, on her small foot. She raises her eyebrows at me, expecting awe or criticism. I go with the latter.

"Apparently you still don't have enough strategy to aim it somewhere besides your foot. You'll be limping in to time." Elena glares at me and crosses her arms. It looks so ridiculous it's almost funny, a petite girl like her scowling at a man like me.

"Why do you think I bothered to punch it?" Elena snaps irritably. "It softens it up. I have more strategy and brains then a mindless Dauntless like yourself would ever give me credit for."

I am stunned. Once again, this initiate challenges me, refuses to back down. Instead of responding, I turn toward the crowd of initiates that's formed behind me, Raina included. She smiles, knowing the scrawny initiate has bested me. She walks up to me, and confronts Elena.

"Elena," she says. "Stand with the other initiates." Elena obeys, standing with Abbey and some

other Erudite named Jerry. He's tall and muscular, dominating the other initiates. Raina nods at me.

"Today, you'll learn to shoot a gun," I say. "It's important to your safety and-"

Once again, Elena snickers. "Really? If we become Dauntless, will safety truly be necessary? I've seen Dauntless scale buildings and stab each other with miscellaneous objects on the street. Ask them, safety isn't a necessity."

I look hard at Elena, who again, remains indifferent. "If you can defend yourself, you're less likely to become a coward with fear of death. Conquering death destroys fear of death. Again, we will shoot guns today. Allow me to demonstrate."

I face the target. I grab a gun, hesitating at first with the memories of Tris's death, and the death and injury of many other friends. After brief hesitation, I insert a bullet, and shoot without thinking twice. With a deafening bang, a circle forms around the bullet mark, straight in the middle, where I intended to land it.

I turn toward the initiates, and say, "Grab a gun. You get lunch when you hit the first three circles on the target."

The initiates scramble toward the guns, and their response says a lot about them. Benjamin from Candor, for example, is cool and arrogant as he struts toward the guns with a smirk on his face. Abbey is eager to please, as she smiles ear to ear as she runs toward the guns. And Elena, of course, is watchful and calculating. She walks to the guns and weighs one in her hand. She then sizes up the bullet, sucks it in her gun, reweighs the gun, and examines the target. Now she's finally ready to shoot.

By now, most initiates have gone through five bullets, shooting randomly in hopes of hitting the target. None have, especially not Laura, who barely has the strength to pull the trigger. All of these fruitless attempts I have seen countless times, so I turn toward Elena.

She looks ready to shoot. She squeezes one eye shut, zeros in on the target with the other, and pulls the trigger.

It was amazing. The bullet hit the center circle, first try. No one had done that. I've never done that. She shakes out her hand, looking casual. By now, everyone is staring at her. Benjamin has an expression of pure hatred and loathing, and Raina is open mouthed. I have no idea what my expression reveals, but if it shows any of my current feelings, then it's not good.

Elena looks up at me. "Can I go to lunch now?" she asks. Dumbfounded, I nod. She sprints away, and everyone resumes target practice, with an occasional murmur. I can almost see Raina's thoughts. As a Candor Born, she was never good at concealing. She thinks, We have a Dauntless prodigy on our hands. I know how I feel.

That was not a lucky shot, or one of a born Dauntless. It was carefully calculated. She was examining her materials, gears turning in her head. But still, it was not an Erudite move. An Erudite would've flaunted it, although a Dauntless would've teased their friends.

It wasn't fully Dauntless. It wasn't fully Erudite.

Elena is Divergent.


	4. Chapter 4

Chapter 4

After lunch, I post the chalkboard for fights. With an even ten, everybody is forced to fight until one opponent is unable to continue. Though Eric is gone, his mark stays, along with his decision to put more brutality into initiation. Though there may be someone that is completely fearless, they cannot become Dauntless without strength or strategy. I face the initiates, a few of them eager, the rest look terrified.

"Today is the physical part of initiation," I say. "With an even ten initiates, two people will fight each other until one is unable to continue. In nine days, you will be ranked with the Dauntless-born initiates. Your rankings serve two purposes; one is so we know in which order to choose your jobs. First ranked gets first pick. Another reason," I continue, pausing for the dramatic effect. "Is that only the top ten initiates become Dauntless members."

There's a collective gasp among the initiates, and they all talk at once. All except Elena. She surely is different, and she's doing a terrible job of hiding it. She's not as smart as she appears or thinks.

"SHUT UP!" Raina yells from her post by the wall. Even I flinch. Raina has the ability to be completely silent when she wants.

Raina stomps toward me. "Who wants to talk?" She scans the sea of extended arms, her eyes settling on a brown one. "Katy," she says, referring to a large and strong Candor.

Katy asks the usual question, "What do you mean, only ten?"

Raina's lip curls. "There are ten of you, and ten Dauntless-born initiates. After Stage One, four of you will fail and become factionless. After stage three, the other six will become factionless, leaving the last ten to become Dauntless."

That answers everyone's questions, and I know that at least half of them would have chosen differently if they'd known about initiation.

Everyone looks shocked, and Raina smiles and stalks back to the wall. I see Elena's face, and it bears a look of utter shock. But her eyes say differently. She doesn't fool me. She knew.

I watch fight after fight, as initiate after initiate falls or knocks a peer to the ground. Benjamin from Candor, Lee from Candor, Don from Erudite, and Cody from Erudite knock out Abbey from Amity, Tyler from Erudite, Laura from Abnegation, and Bobby from Candor. Finally, Katy and Elena square off. Elena may have a chance of survival, but it's so microscopic as to be neglectable.

They stand in front of each other. Katy attempts a punch at Elena, who dodges, and attacks her with a flurry of hits and kicks. She then runs behind Katy, standing readily.

Katy turns toward Elena, and let's out a roar of anger that's almost animal like. She runs at Elena, and aims a punch at Elena's stomach. She catches it, and twists Katy's arm so she cries out. Elena then uses Katy's arm to flip her into a position of pain on her back. Katy groans, and it's clear that she's beat, without a scratch on Elena.

Elena turns toward Raina. "This is ridiculous," she says. "Dauntless is about bravery, not brutality! At this rate, we'll be limping around before stage two!"

Raina's eyes narrow. "This stage narrows our initiates down to those who are strong enough to survive. Leave, everyone. You're free to roam the compound until tomorrow."

Everyone leaves, and I follow Elena. When I'm behind her and about to speak, she turns and tilts her head to hear what I'm going to say.

"I know that you're different," I say. "And you're doing a terrible job of hiding it. You need to fit in better to hide it."

Elena juts out her chin and crosses her arms. "Who says? You're the only one who's said that, so maybe you're different."

I kneel down so I'm eye to eye with her. I'm at least a head taller then her, so it's hard to speak on the same level. "There's a game of Dare with the other Dauntless today," I say. "You can join if you want to make friends ad fit in."

Elena stares at me in that way where I don't know if she'll yell at me or actually smile. She finally says, "What time did you say this was?"


	5. Chapter 5

I stand by the train tracks with Elena. Zeke comes trotting up with Shauna. There are also a few Dauntless members, and a few Dauntless-born initiates. I hear a groan from the rails, as the train roars toward us. As I start running, I see Elena calmly standing in her place. Stupid girl, I think. She'll never catch a train like that. How did she even make it to initiation?

I look back, and the train is advancing toward Elena. She extends her arm, and catches the train. The force of the train causes her body to trail behind her. She pulls herself in, and the other Dauntless flow into the train. I'm the last one, and everyone's looking at Elena. She's picking something out of her nails, oblivious to the stares.

Lauren clears her throat. Unlike when I played, she is not yet drunk. "Okay, kids," she says. "We'll be playing a nice, ruthless game of Dare. For those pansycakes that have not played, you get Dared, drink some alcohol, do the Dare, then Dare someone else, who will then repeat the cycle. In the end, we're all drunk and tired. I will go first." She eyes the crowd, her eyes setting on Zeke. "Zeke," she says. "I dare you to jump onto the Amity's roof, and make a loud noise that will scare the shit out of them."

Zeke grins from ear to ear. "I would've done that without the date," he says, grabbing the bottle of alcohol from her hand and taking a swig. The ten or so Dauntless around me cheer as we get off the train at the Amity sector.

Zeke walks up to a small hut. The light is on, and Amity children, about thirteen, are speaking. Zeke silently climbs up toward the roof. He then stomps on the roof, grunting.

The Amity shriek and file out of the hut. Before they can spot us, we run away laughing. Zeke looks at Callie, a pure Dauntless a year younger then myself. "Callie," he says, tossing her the bottle. "You are dared to steal something from the greenhouses, and don't return until you're caught or the trains coming.

"You're on," Callie says, drinking from the bottle. The Dauntless cheer as she stalks off, stealing something for the pleasure of it. This Dauntless haven is not perfect, far from it. But I didn't choose it for perfection. I chose it for it's freedom.

The night went on like that, getting more drunk by the minute. I hadn't done a Dare yet, which was making me more anxious by the second. It didn't bother me, though. That's one of the perks of being drunk.

Shauna looks toward Elena hungrily, and I know her Dare is coming up. "Elena," Shauna starts, as predicted. "I dare you to do something a Nose would never do, not for a million books."

Elena laughs, still looking sober. She's the only one who hasn't drunk yet. She grabs the bottle from Shauna's hand and takes a small sip. I can tell that it disgusts her, but she doesn't let on. Instead, she starts stripping, not stopping until completely naked. Zeke's staring at her small but full body, and Elena takes no notice. She then hurls herself off the train, the others following suit. This is going to be odd.

Elena screams at the top of her lungs, causing the Abnegation to turn on their lights. They're selfless, too selfless to let a high-pitched scream slide by. A few run to their doorsteps, still in gray bathrobes or pajamas. Elena runs around the sector naked, the other Dauntless whooping and running after her, myself included. If my Abnegation neighbors saw me, they wouldn't recognize me.

After about five minutes, we climb back into the train, Elena in her weird way, us in the Dauntless way. Elena is grinning from ear to ear, until she looks around. Her grin lessens, but doesn't fade. "Damn," she says. "I left my clothes in the other car." She stands, still naked, and staying naked.

"Too bad," Zeke says, unable to suppress a grin. He wiggles his eyebrows up and down. Everyone laughs, even Elena, who dares me to kiss Zeke for three minutes. I do, of course, through laughter.

The rest of the night passes quickly, Elena still naked, until I leave early, eager to sleep, around midnight. The second my head hits the pillow, I leave.


	6. Chapter 6

Chapter 6:

When I wake up, I feel sick to my stomach. Everything hurts, especially my head. A wave of nausea sweeps over me, and I make a break for the bathroom, just in time to spill out the contents of my stomach.

Being drunk does have it's advantages, but then you get the hangover. I lean against the bathtub, my head throbbing. I take a peek at my watch. It's four in the morning. I wonder if Elena is experiencing her vile First Hangover. I know she didn't drink much, but her small body maybe can't handle much alcohol.

I trudge back to my bed and lay down. I still have a few hours until work starts. I close my eyes and try to recap the previous night. I remember leaving early, so I wouldn't go through another round of Dares.

Maybe Elena got drunk anyway? Or maybe she didn't. She is a genius. She probably knows the maximum alcohol allowed before becoming drunk.

That's the last thing I think before I pass out again, this time in a sound sleep.

When I re-wake up, I feel much better. My migraine has turned into a dull ache, and I no longer feel the urge to vomit. I glance at my clock, and it's seven ten. Enough time get to the training room before the initiates.

When I arrive at the in the training room, Elena and Raina are there, five minutes early. I notice something black on Elena's left cheek, realizing that it's a tattoo. A black mark on her whole skin. It must've been a dare. As I get a closer look, it looks like an eight, only turned on its side.

Raina sees me coming, and smiles a toothy, false smile. "Four," she says. "How kind of you to join us. Elena here was just recounting your little game of Dare last night."

Elena turns, and I can't tell by her expression wether she's hung over or not. She does, however catch me staring at her tattoo, and immediately turns away, hiding the eight.

The initiates spill in, ready for a fight. This time, their opponents are different, and they had no way of knowing who they would face. I did, however, match winners with winners, seeing who will remain undefeated.

I have also put Elena first, to observe how she fights when she doesn't have all day to examine her opponent.

Elena steps up to the mat, and so does Cody. He's tall, strong, and handsome. I once found him staring at Elena's body, but I couldn't imagine dating an initiate when I was one. If I were knocks down by someone, I could never look at them the same way again. Besides, Cody may think Elena is beautiful, but he hasn't seen the best of her yet. He hasn't seen her streak in Abnegation. He hasn't seen that she may be skinny, but she's still curvy, and oblivious to it all.

Cody looks wearily at Elena. Just as he's ready to punch, Elena slides between his legs and drives her heel between his legs. A high-pitches squeak escapes his throat, but he's not done.

He attempts to kick her, but she blocks. Although she's winning, something about her attacks are off. They spar for a few minutes, and Cody gets a good punch in. He knocks Elena down, and when she comes up, her nose is bleeding. She looks shocked, then furious. She attacks him like a ferocious cat on a lumbering cow. Cody is knocked down, and Elena wins, again.

When the fights are over, Elena parts ways with her fellow initiates. I follow her. She snakes through the paths of the Pit, opening doors and closing them. Finally, she finds what she's looking for; a girls' bathroom. She walks through this door, of all doors. I sigh, and push the door open.

Elena is standing, naked, in front of a shower curtain. She turns, meets my eyes, and screams so loud my ears ring, bringing my headache back. Elena covers her body self-consciously, and yells, "What the hell, Four!"

I know I should apologize, and leave the room, but I'm not Abnegation anymore. Even three years after, it's still hard to push away my selfless Abnegation self. Instead, I try the Dauntless response.

I snort with fake laughter. "I've already seen it all, Elena. And so has all of Abnegation. It's useless to hide yourself from me."

Elena thinks for a moment, then her arms fall away. "Oh yeah," she says. "What do you want, Four?" I again notice her body, against my Abnegation will. She's very slim, but her body is curvy, her breasts big, her stomach small.

I snap back to reality. "I was wondering if you had a hangover," I say. My throbbing head reminds me to ask.

Elena smiles. "No," she says. "I limited my alcoholic consumption to avoid a hangover. I was just a little tired. But, I can tell you did. You most likely woke early this morning from a restless sleep, had a hangover, then went back to sleep. Headaches usually accompany a hangover, and my shriek reignighted your lingering headache. Am I correct?"

I stare. She knew what happened, but with fancy Erudite language. "Yes," I say. "That's exactly what happened."

Elena looks pleased. "Well, then," she says. "Is that all you needed? Because I still need to take a shower."

My eyes stray from her body, where they previously landed. "Yes," I say. "You can shower now." Elena smiles, and climbs into the shower.

"Thanks," she says through the water. "If you need any alcohol help, or information on any miscellaneous information, let me know."

I walk out of the bathroom, listening to the shower water pelt down on Elena's bare skin. As I climb down the paths of the Pit, Raina approaches me by the chasm. "Hello, Four," she says coldly. "Let's get to the point. I can see that you're trying to help Elena. I may be Dauntless, but I'm not stupid. The initiates need to become Dauntless members on their own. Got it?" I nod. "Good." Raina stalks away, leaving me by the roaring waters of the chasm.


	7. Chapter 7

Chapter 7:

As the initiates spill into the training room after lunch, they look to the chalkboard to see their opponent. They seem confused, so I tell them what's happening. "We'll be throwing knifes today," I say. The initiates understand, and nod. "Grab three knifes, and throw them at an unused target."

The initiates hesitate. "NOW!" Raina yells from her post. The initiates scramble for the knifes. They start throwing, and, as usual, they don't hit the target or stick anywhere. Again, Elena doesn't throw until later, but she hits perfectly in the center, the knife buried in to the handle. She then throws the other two with complete accuracy.

Raina takes a particular interest in this, and walks up to her. "So," she says. "You think you're pretty good at knife throwing." Raina gets close up in Elena's face, but Elena stays still, her face indifferent.

"Well," Elena says. "You tell me. I just got my first three knifes to hit the target and stick, while no other initiate has gotten within the three center circles." Elena crosses her arms and glares, hers matching Raina's.

"Then you'll be comfortable with knifes when someone's life is on the line?" Raina challenges. Her gaze hardens, expecting Elena to simply agree like a good little Dauntless. But we both know that's not true.

Elena matches Raina's cold voice. "Okay. I'll do it, and I can do it in two minutes." That surprises me. She needed five minutes to get ready, and she knows Raina will present her with a new knife.

Raina smiles a pleased smile too wide for her face. "Okay. But you need new knifes. How about some heavier ones?" Raina hands Elena three new, bulkier knifes. Elena grabs and studies the knifes. It takes half her time.

Elena then turns toward the target. "WAIT!" Raina yells. "I forgot one thing. Since you seem like good friends with Abbey, you'll be comfortable throwing them with her by the target." Elena nods, and Abbey shakily steps in front of the target. I sigh. The Dauntless have no imagination. Raina most likely heard that Eric did it last year and, as a former Candor, couldn't think of a way related to knifes to see if Elena is all she's cracked up to be.

With twenty seconds left, Elena throws all three knifes into an arch, each half an inch from Abbey's head. Abbey wasn't watching, she was closing her eyes, so she didn't flinch. Raina looks pleased.

"Fine," she says. "If you've hit the target, you're free to go." Elena leaves, along with Benjamin, Abbey, and Cody.


	8. Chapter 8

Chapter 8:

Afterwards, when all the initiates have hit the target, I try to talk to Elena again. I need to find out what's going on.

I find her walking out of the tattoo parlor, but I can't see any tattoos on her. She was probably seeing a friend get tattooed and left early.

I walk up to her, catching her eye. She smiles, and walks toward me. "Back so soon?" she asks. "Did you have a problem with your alarm clock's circuit board or speaker?" She's smiling, and I feel a pang in my chest. Her smile looks like Tris's. She has the same childlike body shape, yet she's less careful about what she says, and doesn't seem selfless enough to give a drued apricot to a starving factionless.

I smile back. "Actually, I wanted to ask you about your techniques." Elena's smile fades, and I know I've hit a serious point.

"Let's go to the training room," Elena says, jogging past me as I follow her.

We arrive at the training room. Elena turns toward me. "As a born Erudite," she says. "My first reaction to solving a problem is to look at it logically and mathematically, then solve it with a simple equation." Elena holds a knife. "For example," she explains. "To throw a knife with perfect accuracy, you must measure the weight, length, hight, and depth of the throwing knife. Once you know how hard to throw the knife, you must know how to position your knife and arm. I measure the angles of my arm, do an equation, and," Elena throws the knife, and it lands perfectly. "You throw it."

I never knew knife throwing could be so complicated and mathematical. For me and the other Dauntless, you throw a knife, look at where it went, and aim somewhere different for better results.

"What about fighting?" I ask. "I can tell that you have absolutely no muscle, and you've faced some tough opponents."

Elena says, "I look for weak spots, and when they're doubled over in pain from my oddly sharp elbows and knees, I attack because they're too weak to block or fight back. The best times to attack are when they are attempting an attack, when they're in pain, distracted, or if they're generally weak."

We fight for a few minutes, being careful not to hurt eachother too bad, and we're evenly matched with her logic, and my experience and muscle. She knows how hard to hit without hurting me too bad, and she doesn't give up.

After we're hot and sweaty, Elena says, "That was fun. Anyway, Abbey and Tyler will be wondering where I am. See ya!"

Elena runs off toward the transfer dorms, leaving me alone. I turn toward the punching bag. Elena is a worthy opponent, and I know I can't beat her ins. Battle of wits. So if I ever have to fight her for real, I'm going to need to get in shape.


	9. Chapter 9

Chapter 9:

Some time later, when I'm standing by the chasm, recapping the training room sequence, two hand cover my eyes, and a cheerful male voice says, "Guess who?" I pull the hands away, and look at Zeke. He smiles and says, "We're going zip lining today. Wanna come?" I look at him.

"You know my answer," I say. "But I will wait at the bottom and catch those going down." Before he can interrupt me, I add, "Tris told me about it." I choke up on her name. It's still hard, even though it's been so long. Zeke's still sad about Uriah, even though he can live happily in spite of grief. I have to learn how to do that, but I'm not as positive as him.

Zeke smiles. "Okay," he says. "Be at the end of the zip line at ten." Zeke jogs away, and I realize something:

No matter how hard I try, how many years I live as a Dauntless, I will never be one.

At ten, I wait by the end of the zip line, and, ironically, Lauren's waiting with me. It feels like waiting by the net, only we know for sure that a black blur will come shooting down at us, and this time, we're responsible for their life. If we don't catch them, they'll fall and get mortally wounded or killed. I shudder. I'm thinking too much into this. This isn't fighting for the life of the Divergent. This is catching friends after a harmless Dauntless game.

A black figure shoots toward us. Once they stop, I see Zeke's smiling face. He throws his head back dramatically. "Catch me, Four!" he says as he drops and Lauren and I catch him. Zeke says, "There'll be more coming soon," and he points at the line, where a good-natured scream is emerging. When the screamer stops, I see Elena's smiling face. "That was awesome," she says as she drops. Elena is so small, she falls into only my arms, and I'm carrying her bridal-style. She laughs and slings her arm around my neck, kicking her feet. I can feel my face reddening. I drop her down lightly, and she stands, using my shoulder to balance herself. She smiles and looks up at me, then walks next to Lauren and starts talking to her.

Then next few people come, and we catch them. I suddenly feel affection for this Dauntless tradition. From what Zeke says, it brought him and Shauna closer together. As the night goes on, some Dauntless bring out alcohol, which I politely refuse, following Elena's example and avoiding a hangover. She then walks up to me and gestures for me to come down toward her. I kneel down, and she says, "Drinking half the bottle will give you an alcoholic reaction similar to mine." I understand. In Dauntless language, that means 'Half bottle means no hangover.' I'm in.

It's not that I'm addicted to alcohol, but it helps me forget how awful the world is without requiring being in love, in pain, or so focused I can barely blink.

So we laugh and drink, lingering by the zip line, even though everyone has gone. As we stagger home, almost all drunk, a sudden thought races through my mind; this is Dauntless.


	10. Chapter 10

Chapter 10:

The next morning, I'm pleased to find that I don't have a hangover, just a mild headache. There's pounding on my door, and I look at my clock. It's seven thirty. When I walk to the door, it's Elena, wearing a tank top and very short shorts, with bare feet. Her hair's in a tangle on the top of her head, and she has some kind of bracelet stuck in it. She's out of breath. "C'mon Four," she says between wheezes. "Someone jumped into the Chasm."

That's enough to get me out of my apartment. Elena doesn't seem fazed by seeing her instructor privately in his own home, but then again, I've seen her naked twice.

I walk out with her panting like a dog, but jogging to keep up with me. Her short legs have to go twice as fast to keep up with mine. When I look back at her, I see something I've never seen on her before; a green streak in her hair. Day by day, she's becoming more Dauntless, and I can tell that she's doing it to hide herself in with the other Dauntless.

When we arrive at the Chasm, I feel a clench in my stomach. What if it's another initiate? What if it's a friend who's mind was addled by a hangover from a little too much alcohol last night? I couldn't live with one of those, knowing I could've helped them live for at least a week longer before they disappeared into depression again.

As they tow the body up, Elena buries her head into my arm. I tense up, stupidly. In Abnegation, touching someone is an intimate act. But here in Dauntless, looking to someone for happiness is what acquaintances do.

I look up at the body, trying to recognize the face, but there are too many Dauntless men putting the body into a bag. I see Elena talk to a stranger next to her, then turns toward me. "His name was Dimitri Cortez," she says. "Did you know him?" I shake my head. Dimitri was a stranger to me, but not to the dozen people crying up front. Family or close friends mourning his death.

Abbey walks up to us, and hugs Elena. I know she's not sad for Dimitri, but born an Amity, she was raised that violence was depressing and deserved mourning.

Raina walks up, and yells, "SHUT THE HELL UP!" Everyone quiets down, and she gives the typical speech, which I tune out and watch a tear slide down Abbeys cheek.

The initiates didn't have fights that day, due to the ceremonial paintball game. I gather the initiates, and tell them, "We're doing something different today. Follow me."

I lead the initiates to the tracks, Raina trailing behind. We reach the train tracks, a minute before the train arrives. We stand by the tracks, Elena with her arm out to catch the train. The train comes roaring by, and everyone runs toward the train. By the time I get on the train, everyone's already on.

I point to a box full of paintball guns. "Grab one. We're playing Capture the Flag." As the initiates grab guns, I explain the game. As they load the guns, Raina and I choose our teams. I choose first, so I get Elena, Cody, Lee, Tyler, Abbey, and a handful of Dauntless borns, including Wayne, the second jumper Elena pushed down. Raina takes her team consisting of Benjamin, Don, Laura, Katy, and some Dauntless borns I've never met. "You can get off first," I say. Raina nods and takes her team off the train. I turn to my team. "Remember one thing. Winning isn't important. Try to use this experience to build a strategy and be brave. Dauntless isn't about brutality, it's about having the bravery to stand up for one another, to have the bravery to do what's right."

At that, we jump off the train to hide our flag. As we walk through the marshy sod, I hear Abbey and Tyler pushing eachother like friends in Dauntless do. Tyler's doing pretty well in his fights, he'll be somewhere in the middle of the group, unless his rankings change drastically.

We arrive at the foot of the Ferris Wheel, and I turn toward the initiates. "Start discussing strategies," I command. They immediately start bickering, and I watch Elena. She knows the best strategy, but she's holding it in.

She turns to the Ferris Wheel, and starts climbing it, but only a few rungs up. Then, she grabs a tree branch and climbs it. I follow her lead, and wait until we're a few branches up to ask, "What are you doing?"

Elena sits on a branch and looks down at me. "I'm climbing a tree, isn't that obvious?" She smiles. "I'm trying to see where their base is. I would've climbed the Ferris Wheel, but it still works and has a high chance of breaking and killing us. This tree is much more efficient." She climbs a few feet higher, then points into the distance.

"See?" she says. "Their base I over there, in the clearing behind the thick wall of foliage." I stare at where her finger points, and see small circles of light indicating flashlights. "Let's get down," I say, trying to be subtle about getting my feet back on solid ground, where falling won't kill me.

Once we're back down, Elena discusses a flawless strategy to her teammates, who turn it down for a Dauntless strategy; hide the flag well enough where they can't find it, so everyone can run in and destroy the other team. Elena shakes her head. She knows we'll be destroyed, and she's not going to stop it.

We run in to the other team, where everyone gets shot but Lee, Elena, me, and Callie. We wait until the right moment to strike, and shoot down two thirds of their team, taking dien Lee and Callie, and I can't find Elena. When I'm shot, I see her in a tree, shooting down opponents, then ducking behind a thick wall of leaves.

Eventually, only Raina is left, out of Elena's range, when Benjamin runs out from behind Elena's tree, holding our flag. He let out a whoop of joy, and Elena shot him anyway in the head. The pressure knocks him down, and my team is laughing hysterically.

Elena climbs down and, looking victorious, puts her foot on Benjamin's back, and he lets out a groan. Smiling, Elena exclaims, "He may have got the flag, but I'm the winner!" She shoots Raina, then runs toward the tracks. Everyone follows her, and, when I catch up to her, she trips me. I stumble and almost fall, but not quite. We get on the train, Raina glaring at no one in particular, Benjamin squeezing a paintball, rage painted across his face. Without warning, the paintball spurts neon green paint into his eye. He screams an

d tries to get it out, as his fellow initiates laugh harder then when he was shot. I smile when I see Elena behind him with a sharp stick. She might just belong here.

**The first person to review on this chapter gets to help me choose the ending if they choose to!**


	11. Chapter 11

Chapter 11:

Days went by, fights went by, and something was brewing inside of me. I continued to hang out with Elena. Not on purpose, but I constantly had questions for her brain, and she had questions about Dauntless for me. I had always seen Elena as a friend, but now I'm starting to think something else. She's pretty, and I know that. But that's not all. That's why Zeke likes Elena. I know Elena better, and she's a good friend, and maybe more, because of her refusal to give up, her humor that even I laugh at, and how she's not afraid to speak her mind. During the first week of initiation, she turned full on Dauntless. She got dyed and pierced, tattooed and completely changed. Except not the inside.

She's still the first jumper Erudite girl, but outside she looks like she'd lived in Dauntless her whole life. No day during initiation after Dimitri's death really stood out, until the last day of fighting.

That day, I was ready to end fighting, and so glad that it's over. I'd seen initiates limping around, bruised and battered. Elena had still won each if her fights, and now she and Benjamin would square off as the only undefeated ones.

I have faith in Elena. We've become friends over the last week, and though Raina openly disagrees with it, she hasn't spoke to me again about it.

Elena and Benjamin face off. I can see the determination in her eyes. Benjamin would've been snobby if he'd faced Elena earlier in initiation, but now he knows her true power, and he's determined to stay undefeated, to become the victor. He's this group's Peter, the reckless initiate that cares only about dominating initiation, no matter who he has to maul to do it.

They fight for a while, until Benjamin grabs her arm and pulls it hard. Elena screams, so I think he dislocated it. While Elena collapses, he punches her ankle so hard I hear a crack. Elena, suppressing screams, stands and punches his face, unsteady on her one good leg. Benjamin's nose is bleeding, and he grabs her head and hits it with his own. Elena crumples to the ground, and I stare in horror. I can barely squeak out, "Dismissed." The initiates file out, leaving Elena on the ground, blood gushing from her head. I fight my gag reflex. I've seen many initiates bleeding on the floor, but not one that I liked. I carry her to the infirmary, careful not to hit her head on anything. I hear her groan and say, "Four?" I nod an look into her eyes. They're dark, so dark they almost look black. But they're dark brown, and they sparkle when she laughs. They look happy to most people, but to me they look calculating and processing.

At the infirmary, I lay Elena down on a bed, and when her head hits the pillow she winces. Her eyes open slightly. "What happened, Four?" she asks. Her voice is rough and creaky, and it's fading as she loses consciousness. Her eyes look up to mine, and though she's injured, they still have that spark that never dies out.

"Benjamin beat you," I say softly. This isn't Four, this is Tobias. The Tobias I exposed only to Tris. The thought of sharing our special moments with a loudmouth Erudite nothing like either of us.

Elena nods. "I'll probably be okay tomorrow. By ankles only fractured, and I think I have a concussion. That shitbag tried to destroy me, but he'll have to do better than that. If I stay in this bed all day today, I can limp along tomorrow."

I flinch at 'shitbag,' even though that's not the point of the sentence. "What?" Elena asks, sensing my uncomfortability. "Oh, you don't cuss. Well, get used to it. This is Dauntless." Her voice is back to normal from talking to me. "Anyway, a word is a word, no matter how bad they're supposed to be. Cusses are simply words that are made to express anger or rebellion when, in truth, they're just words. And people who think saying them makes them cool are shitbags. I use them as normal words, how they are."

I never thought of it that way. But still, cusses make people uncomfortable and express self-indulgence. So, like the Stiff I am, I don't cuss.

"Sleep," I say. "You need to heal. That way, in a couple days, you can really kick butt." Elena laughs. "I'll tell you the rankings tomorrow when you wake up, okay?" Elena nods, then closes her eyes. Soon enough, her breaths even, and she's asleep.

I walk into the transfer form, where ally the transfers are sitting anxiously. Benjamin looks pleased with himself, and Abbey looks sad. I don't need to tell them to shut up, they're already quieter then an Abnegation funeral. "Transfers," I say. "I will now post your ranks. Remember; nothing is official until the Dauntless-born ranks are posted but if you're numbers one through five, you're safe." I post the rankings, and I hear a collective sigh from five initiates. They're safe. For now. Four of them are paralyzed. Factionlessness is terrifying, and so is uncertainty. I leave the room, and I see Katy sitting by Benjamin, and something gleams in her pocket.


	12. Chapter 12

Chapter 12:

When I get back to my apartment, I reread the rankings. I put up:

Benjamin

Elena

Katy

Lee

Don

Cody

Tyler

Abbey

Laura

Bobby

I'm kind of disappointed. I wanted Laura to be like Tris. Instead, she'll be factionless. I already know the Dauntless-born results, and two of my initiates will leave. That's Bobby and Laura. Apparently not all Stiff transfers are like us. But instead, I got a new girl. I got a genius, a pretty, funny, outgoing genius. Tomorrow I'll post the rankings, and hopefully no one will get stabbed in the eye. I hear a knock on my door, and it's Zeke. He smiles. "Hey, Four!" he says. "Would've talked to you yesterday, but I had a massive hangover. Anyway, what's up? I hardly see you anymore! Are you dating one of the initiates yet?" I tense up at those words. Not just because I miss Tris, but because if anyone knows my feelings for Elena, including Elena, my life would be ruined. I would be fired and possibly factionless. It can't - won't - happen.

"No," I say, too sharply. "Why would you think that?"

Zeke smiles. "Chill out, man! You haven't been caught kissing Laura yet." The thought of my lips against Laura's makes me gag. Zeke must have seen my disgusted face, because he laughed. "Anyway," he continues. "I heard that on initiate, Elena, the hot girl with the hot bod, got best up pretty bad. What happened?"

I launch into an explanation, leaving out our talk and all the blood, even though I know it wouldn't bother him. When I finish, it's time to go to dinner, so Zeke and I go. When we arrive, there's a surprise waiting for us.

Elena sits with Abbey and Tyler, a bandage on her forehead and her foot wrapped up tight. She smiles and waves us over.

"Surprise!" she says, flinging her arms in the air and consequently hitting Tyler and Abbey in the face. "The nurse said that I had a minor concussion and a twisted ankle, which is good enough for me to be out here! Of course, she didn't say that last part, but I knew myself. Don't tell her, though. She doesn't know I'm out here." Her smile grows wider, and I'm glad to see that she's back to her normal self. As normal as a sixteen year old genius in Dauntless can be.

We talk for a while. Not just Elena and I, but Zeke Tyler, Abbey, and Shauna too, who comes out later on. Soon after we discuss the best way to free yourself if your hands are bound together, I hear a shout. "Cake!"

Everyone scrambles to the cake. It's not like it's phenomenal, it's just good cake. It also contains a lot of sugar, which may explain the Dauntless' everlasting energy.

I look back, and Elena's gone. I look at Zeke for an explanation, and he just shrugs. When I turn back, Elena's there with six slices of cake, and six ropes. She smiles deviously.

"Let's see who can eat their piece of cake fastest with their hands tied behind their back." Her malicious grin widens as she ties our hands behind our backs. When she's done with ours, she ties her own. She looks at me, because she knows that if notice her doing things normal people cannot. "I read a knot tying book," she explains as she finishes. "Three, two one GO!"

Immediately we smash our faces into out cake and eat. The Dauntless are competitive and never back down.

Within one minute, Zeke yells, "DONE!" Almost simultaneously as Elena yells it. Zeke says, "I won!" and he did Elena knows it. But she doesn't care.

She pulls the knot apart from her wrists and stretches them. Zeke says, "A little help?" Elena thinks for a moment, then shakes her head.

"Nah," she says. "I want to see you try." She smiles as Zeke struggles with his own wrists, eventually falling off his own seat, causing an eruption of laughter to rise from our table. Elena says, between girlish giggles, "Okay, I think you've learned your lesson. Never, I repeat never rub it in my face if you beat me. Got it?" Zeke nods, and Elena unties his wrists, along with everyone else's.

I'm only half way through my piece, but I already feel sick. So I push it away, and Zeke lunges for it, stabbing his fork into it. "What's the matter, Four?" he asks. I shake my head, but Elena's studying me. She knows what's wrong, and I don't doubt she's right.

After the whole cake contest, I'm still feeling sick, so I excuse myself and head to my apartment. When I arrive, I run to the bathroom and vomit into the toilet. It's not a hangover, because I haven't had alcohol for a week or so. When I'm done puking, I turn to the bathroom door frame, where Elena stands. She scares the crap out of me, so I jump back, making my stomach lurch and I throw up in the toilet again. When I finish, I turn to Elena. "Why are you in here, and what's wrong?"

Elena steps closer and flushes the toilet. Then she runs to me. "I'm here because I know what's wrong. Your door was open, so I decided to tell you. Where you were heading, I knew you'd be vomiting. Come with me."

She grabs a trash bag and hands it to me. Then, she limps out of my apartment, and I follow her, clutching the bag but not puking anymore.

We arrive at the infirmary, and she calls out, "Carrey!" and sits me down on a bed. A blonde woman comes rushing in from another door that reads 'Employees Only.'

"Elena!" she shrieks. "I've been looking all over for you! You know you're not in a stable condition and-"

"Carrey!" Elena interrupts. "Shut up. I need test MSARR. And I know I'm not a qualified nurse or doctor to inject someone with a needle, but I think I can fix this." Carrey sighs and hands Elena a box with a needle and syringe inside. The contents are clear. Is this a simulation?

Elena sticks the needle into me, and the deep ache is familiar. But instead of a the world around me dissolving into a simulation, Elena looks at the computer next to her, taps in a few keys, then nods.

"Yep," she says. "I was right." With that, she turns toward me. "Four, we have found, in Dauntless words, 'Yo, man, sugar bad. Allergy.'" She slurs her voice and deepens it, and says that last part like Zeke, which takes me so off guard I almost don't register what she says. No sugar? She can see the question on the tip of my tongue, so she says, in her normal voice, "Symptoms may include vomiting, diarrhea, throat closure, and high fever. You are advised to stay away from sugar. You may now return to your room." Having given me the necessary information, she turns the compute off, looks at her watch, which reads 9:37, and lays down on her own bed. She closes her eyes, and falls asleep. Carrey looks at me.

"Your symptoms should end by tomorrow morning. Goodbye." She dissapeared behind the Employees Only door, and I sit by Elena's bed. I look at her watch, which before stemmed like a bronze band. Now I see that it's golden and shimmery, and she slid in a picture of us by the zip line. A picture Zeke took of her laughing so hard her cheeks are red, and me smiling, too. The thought of that truly happy moment makes me smile, and I'm happy all night, falling asleep with a grin plastered on my face.


	13. Chapter 13

When I wake up, I no longer feel sick. I hear Elena pounding on my door, again. I know it's her because accompanying her fists on the door is, "Four! Open up! Four, goddamn it ow, OPEN UP!" It's only three, so it must be important.

I open the door, and Elena is standing outside, her bandages gone, shaking her fist out. I notice that she has new piercings, a ring through her eyebrow, and a stud through her nose. The skin's still red, but more pink. "Damn it, Four," she says. "I've been trying to get in here for five minutes. You sleep like a rock."

"Back to the point," I say. "Why are you here? Did someone kill themselves again?" I couldn't live with Dauntless if there were two deaths in one month.

Elena purses her lips. "Kind of . . . just follow me." She runs out of my apartment, me following in my pajamas.

We run to the transfer dorm, Elena panting, me stopping every so often so she could rest. Erudite don't run very much, but even with that setback, she's a pretty good runner.

Once we get there, Elena points toward a bed, and it's covered in blood. All the initiates are awake, sitting straight up or curled in a ball. I take a look at the bloody bed, and so does Elena. When she sees it, she automatically recoils, her face bearing a look of horror.

It's Benjamin. The handle of a knife sticks out from his back, which is bleeding like hell. I turn his body over, and his eyes are closed. I open them, and they're glazed over. He's dead. One of my initiates is dead, by another initiate. This is worst then that initiate, Edward. I turn to the crowd of initiates, and try to look fierce. "If anyone has any information about this attack, bring it forward." My voice echoes throughout the silent room. "The homicide of a fellow initiate is a serious business, and reckless Dauntless are not needed in our community." I cover the body with the sheets of his bed. "Go to sleep. You'll have to wake up as usual today for stage two."

In a way, I'm relieved. Laura will stay with Benjamin gone, with a chance to prove herself as the new Tris. That relief makes me feel sick again.

I walk out but not back to my apartment. I walked to Raina's apartment, and banged on the door. "I'M COMING!" Yelled a voice. Raina's heavy with sleep and anger. "Damn it, can you wait a few hours?"

Raina opens the door, her long hair in a tangled mess around her head. "What the hell do you want, Four?" she asks.

"An initiate stabbed another initiate in the back," I say. "I know that Dauntless will do nothing about it, but I need someone to take the body away." Before she answers, I walk away, leaving her in her doorway, speechless.


	14. Chapter 14

Chapter 14:

When it's time for initiation to start, I wait in the training room, knowing that the initiates will come here.

Elena comes in first, as usual. "So," she says. "What happened? Benjamin's body was gone this morning." Her head tilts in that way when she's listening, or processing new information."

I shake my head. "I just told Raina about it, so she cleaned up his body." It feels disgusting just to say it.

"So," Elena says, obviously changing the subject. "No more sugar reactions?" I'd completely forgotten about last night's sugar reaction, due to the Benjamin fiasco.

"Um, fine," I say, uncomfortable talking about private issues with Elena, even though she's a friend, and I know I like her. "Nothing new." Elena nods, and Abbey comes up.

"Elena! Hi!" she says, as if I'm not there. Then again, no one thinks of initiation instructors as fellow Dauntless. They see them more as playthings, necessary and important until their personal use is fulfilled. After that, they're just something they occasionally notice and don't care about.

"Hi, Abbey," Elena says, plastering a fake smile onto her face so Abbey won't see her worry for everyone's safety.

The initiates trickle in as Elena and Abbey talk, Elena trying to include me, Abbey ignoring me completely, and me trying to stay out until Elena eventually quits and joins the crowd of initiates.

"Today we'll start stage two of initiation," I say, moving from Elena's Friend Four to Initiation Instructor Four. "If you'll follow me, you can start the part of initiation that's more Dauntless then ruthless."

We walk to the fear simulation room, and I tell them to wait outside the room on the bench. I know it's cruel. Especially when you know only a few fears when you're about to face all of them.

I watch initiates face fear after fear, arachnophobia, claustrophobia, everything. The fears I want to see are Elena's. She's almost last, but I get to her. I start with the opening speech to the fear landscape.

"Today you will literally face your fears." I hold up the needle. "Thanks to a simulation. The simulation will stimulate-"

"The amygdala." Elena interrupts. "The amygdala is the part of your brain responsible for processing negative emotions, such as fear, anger, or grief. I will be put into a hallucination that will represent one of my many fears, that will most likely be from nine to fourteen. I will escape the hallucination when I either calm my heartbeat or face my fear. The fear simulation is different then the fear landscape program, in which I will face all my fears in one injection, and I will be aware that it is a simulation. You can stick me with the needle now."

I'm not surprised. Elena is an Erudite child genius that read knot - tying books in her free hours. So I stuck her with the needle, and she doesn't flinch. I put my face by hers, so close our noses almost touch. "Be brave, Elena," I say. Elena smiles, and closes her eyes. Then the simulation takes her, and I watch her nightmare on a screen.

Elena is tied to a chair, but I can tell that she can't undo the knots. An Erudite man looks toward her, holding a gun. He looks like Elena, but only just. His brown hair has tints of gray, and he looks old enough to be her father. He has a short and sturdy body type, and his face looks tired and has lines that shouldn't be there at his age. He's about Marcus's age.

"Tell me your secrets, Lotte," he says. His voice is cold and even, almost robotic. Lotte must've been her name in Erudite. It suits her. Lotte juts her chin out.

"Tell me your secrets," he says again. "Or I'll shoot you."

Lotte stares evenly at him. Her heart is racing, but she looks normal. "Kill me, and you'll never know my secrets. They'll die with me." She looks evenly at the man. "And I'd rather die then exploit any simple secret to you, Wicket."

Lucas stares at her. "Then die," he says. He raises the gun, and fires. It hits her in the head, and she falls, just as the real her whips up, looking calm and patient. Other initiates looked pained and hysterical, needing a few moments to calm down and hyperventilate. Lotte looks calm, and she looks into my eyes.

"How long did that take?" she asks, like she's asking how long it took to clean up a food spill.

I look evenly at her. "It took two minutes and forty-five seconds." I'm usually not that precise, but Lotte needed to know every detail. "That's almost four times shorter then average."

Lotte smiles. "Well, I guess it's lucky that my fears so quick." Then her weak smile fades. "Now that you know a bit about me, you want answers, don't you? If so, meet me by the Chasm at ten."

She slides out of the seat, and leaves the room. There's only one question now; what are her secrets?


	15. Chapter 15

After fear landscapes, I wander the Pit to shake my memories of the batch of terrors. It feels like I'm a trespasser, an unknown visitor watching their worst nightmares unfold and watch them face them.

At the doorstep of my apartment sits an Erudite newspaper. It reminds me that the anniversary of Jeanine Matthews' death. The cover shows Jeanine herself, and her less-known daughter, Charlotte Matthews.

After her fear simulation, I'd been trying fruitlessly to figure out Lotte's secret. Looking at this paper, I see Charlotte Matthews. She looks a lot like Lotte. Her hair is a dark brown, almost black, matching her eyes. But Charlotte has a sternness in her eyes, her hair longer and in a tight knot on the back of her head. Glasses rest on her nose, emphasizing her wide eyes and taking attention away from her delicate features. Jeanine, however, looks a lot like Lotte. The same calculating eyes, that say they know what you're thinking before you think it. Their faces are both small and ovular, and they both have a small, shaped nose. They're both attractive, even to the naked eye, not like others where their beauty takes time to notice.

I've never seen anyone with Lotte's intelligence. Not even Jeanine presented her intellectual aura. I have, however, heard of lab mutation, where people are generically mutated to be smarter. Maybe Lotte is Charlotte, with a mutated brain. The thought alone makes me shudder. I'll just wait until ten.

I'll just wait.

At nine fifty, I sit by the chasm, thinking about love. If Lotte wants to love me, I can't be friends with her anymore. Love was a thing of the past, shared between only me and Tris. Liking another girl is one thing, my heart fluttering when she touches me, finding myself looking for her among a sea of faces. But I cannot love another girl, no matter how much I like her.

At exactly ten, Lotte comes jogging toward me. Her face looks indifferent then it would've if she'd come to ask me about work in the control room. But there is a difference. I can't quite place it, but there is one.

Lotte sits by me. "So," she says. "Answers." She takes a deep breath to calm herself down, then looks into my eyes. "Have you figured out who I am yet? I know you're not a genius," I flinch at the word 'genius,' but Lotte downs notice. "But it doesn't take one to know who I am." She pauses, and I realize that's my cue to speak.

"You're Charlotte Matthews," I say. She nods, and let's me continue. "You're brain was genetically mutated so-"

"Whoa," Charlotte says. "I'm gonna stop you there. My brain was not mutated, although you have acknowledged my abnormal intellectual capacities. The man in my fear landscape was my father, Lucas Wicket. He's a factionless man, a former Erudite with a fetish for geniuses."

I frown. "But Jeanine was never married."

Charlotte bites her tongue. "No, she never was. But I am her child." She waits for this to sink in before continuing. "Go ahead, call me a bastard, I've heard it all. I'm an accidental child, one with an abnormal brain." She's shouting by now, but she calms herself down. "Sorry. I'm so used to being teased, but I know you won't tease me. You came from either Amity or Abnegation as I've gathered, and they aren't really the teasing type."

I let that comment pass, trying to comfort her. "What's wrong with being as smart as you are? You could've killed it in Erudite, but you chose Dauntless?"

Charlotte shoots me a look. "You think I like being this way? I chose Dauntless because I would've stuck out like green on white. Here in Dauntless, everyone's so different. In Erudite, they would've taken advantage of my brain, made me like my mother. And I'd rather be dead then Jeanine." She tilts her head. "Did you know that at my time in Erudite, when I was fourteen, my mother had me help construct the attack simulation, assuring me that it was a way to train soldiers if we were bombarded by the bitches outside the fence? I actually finished it, thinking it would be used to save us from utter destruction of life as we know it. She knew, I knew, and the Abnegation leaders knew about the Outside. No one else. My motives could've been described as evil, but I was fourteen. When I was interrogated, I was let off the hook. My brain, they decided, was being used by those who didn't possess it, not the one who does."

My mouth goes dry. I am in front of the girl that is in charge of countless deaths, including Tris's parents. All but the Erudite say, 'ignorance is bliss,' meaning the less they know, the better. But if it wasn't for ignorance, Tris may still be alive today.

"I have something to show you," I say, my stomach clenching. I usually don't rush into things, but I know that Charlotte is special. But something inside of me says No! It's true, I only did this for Tris. But I have to remember; Tris is gone forever. I can't spend my life over the loss of hers.

Charlotte says. "Then show me." I stand, and she follows. I lead her too the fear landscape room, and her eyes widen with understanding. "Oh," she says. That's all she can say. I grab two needles, set the computer to my fears, and inject her. She doesn't even flinch as I hand her the needle, trusting she knows what to do. Her hands shake as she injects me. Even though Charlotte acts tough, I know she's terrified of what all Erudite are afraid of. The unknown.

"Four?" she asks, and I turn so I can see her face. "What's your real name? What faction did you come from?"

I smile as well as I can, worried if it looks like a grimace. "See if you can figure it out," I say. I try to say 'Be brave, Charlotte,' but I can't get more then, "Be-" before the simulation swallows us.

We land on the roof where initiates first jump. The view is beautiful, at first, but when I look down, there's no net at the bottom. Just a gaping hole. Charlotte turns toward me. "Bataphobia," she says, matter-of-factly. "Common phobia. To face this fear, I will push you, and you'll be transported into the next one." Before I can object, she shoves me into the darkness, afterwards jumping herself. I hit the ground, and Charlotte hits soon after.

When Charlotte gets up, she dusts herself off. "The most common way to get rid of a fear is heartbeat control, but that takes much too long. I find facing it head on works better. Your next fear should appear soon." Almost immediately, a wooden wall slams my back and hers with such force that were stuck together with no way of peeling ourselves off eachother. I look up and a wall is touching my head, forcing me too the ground. But I won't go down, I won't.

"This fear will take a little longer," Charlotte says, calmly. It's almost too calm. Is she Divergent, like me? "Too get better, the fear must get worst until it loosens its grip. So," she pulls me down with her, our knees touching our chests. "Let's pass the time as you control your heartbeat, as facing this fear is more complicated."

"Okay," I say. "I'll ask you some questions. How's Dauntless?" Lame. That's the worst pick up ever, and she notices. She raises her eyebrows at me.

"Let's try something else," she says. "Laughter usually doesn't work, as your heart rate will speed, so, stay calm. Tell me about Dauntless. The good things."

So I described the wonderful things of Dauntless; freedom, fun, and how everyone fits in. Slowly, I calmed down, until the box breaks and I'm free. I straighten up, still feeling her warm legs on mine.

We walk until we see a door, which I push open. A light turns on, and I see Tris. I haven't faced my fear landscape since her death, but I know what this is. I must watch her die, painfully, and do nothing.

Charlotte watches with interest as Tris lays on the floor, gasping for breath. "Help," she rasps, so quiet and hoarse that it's almost a whisper. Her blonde hair is scraggly, and a pool of blood gathers around her head. "Tobias," she says. "Help." The. She collapses, and I know she's dead. Charlotte takes my head and leads me too a door the simulation created.

Through the door is a large room, containing only a large mirror. I look at it, and see Marcus. Charlotte walks up next to me, and sees herself as Jeanine. Her reflection turns toward Marcus, and so does she. I do the same.

"Pleasure to see you, Marcus," says Charlotte in Jeanine's voice, cold and cruel. Marcus nods at her, causing me to follow.

"As it is to you, Ms. Matthews." My vocal chords feel tight, using his deep voice so different from my own.

We shake hands, and Charlotte opens her mouth again, and says, "We must discuss-" her voice stops and her voice contorts. She continues in her regular voice, but strained, as if fighting against itself. "This isn't real," she reminds me. "But you have to face it. Not me."

It takes all my strength to turn toward the mirror against the simulation's will. I punch it, shattering the glass and giving me control over my own body once more.

Then the simulation ends, and we're no longer in a dark room with the shattered mirror. We're standing in the fear landscape room. Charlotte looks indifferent, but I'm shaking, as I always do when facing my fears.

Charlotte looks at me. "So," she says. "You're Tobias Eaton, and you have only Four fears, presenting you with your name, Four."

I nod. "Let's go back to the Chasm."

At the Chasm, she looks at me. "We both have secrets," she says. "I thought I was the only one with huge secrets, but apparently I'm wrong." She doesn't have to worry about her secret being exploited. I keep my promises, and she no longer looks like Charlotte Matthews, thanks to her tattoo, green hair, and piercings.

"Charlotte-" I start, but she stops me with her hand in the air.

"I'm not Charlotte," she says haughtily. "I came here to be a new person with a new background, so I am no longer Charlotte Jeanine Matthews. I'm Elena Lorelei Embers. I'm Elena, and you're Four." I almost recoil. She's practically yelling by now, and I hadn't realized she thought about this so much.

"Okay," I say, trying to sound as if that hadn't disturbed me or my manner. "When did you choose your name and why, Elena?" That seemed to please her.

"The name Elena means 'A bright shining light.' I'd always imagined myself as a light that would never go out. I knew that Lorelei means something fun and carefree, so I went with it because it's unique. And Embers shows my devotion to Dauntless. I know no one's going to ask me, but I know from experience that's it's best to know ahead of time just in case."

I almost laugh. "So, how long did it take to come out with Elena Lorelei Embers?" She looks at me like it's a stupid question some random factionless should know.

"Five minutes," she says. "I came up with it before it was my turn to Choose." Of course. The Erudite are by far the most creative of the five, they can think of anything in the shortest amount of time.

"I should go," Charlotte says. No matter what I call her, she'll always be Charlotte. "The other initiates will wonder where I am if I'm not back by morning, and you're probably tired anyway."

Now that she mentioned it, I was exhausted. Fear landscapes are tiring, no matter how many times you go through them. "Then I'll see you tomorrow," I say. She nods, then walks to the transfer dorm. I stay at the Chasm for a few minutes, watching the rushing water, before walking back to my apartment.

As I'm falling asleep, I remind myself not to fall in love. Love always ends in heartbreak, one way or another. Charlotte's just a fellow secret keeper. As I doze off, I try to think Loving Charlotte will break hearts. But I fall asleep before I can get past Loving Charlotte.

That night, I dream that Charlotte and I are in love.


	16. Chapter 16

Chapter 16:

The next morning is another fear landscape day. Today the initiates gather in the waiting room, all wasting time in their own way; Abbey tapping her knee, Laura cleaning the floor, Katy and Lee are thumb wrestling, and Charlotte is building something from trinkets scattered around the floor before Laura gets to them.

As I call in the initiates, the crowd thins, until it's just Charlotte and I. I wanted her to be last so we could talk later on without me abandoning another initiate.

She slides into her seat. "Any idea of what fear you'll face today?" I ask. Charlotte shakes her head, and leans back, pulling her hair back so I can inject her. Once the liquid is poured into her veins, I look at the computer. "If they're any new secrets, I'll see here, so you don't have to tell me." She doesn't reply, and I wonder why she isn't talking. When I look over, I see her taken by the simulation, so I watch in.

"Hello, Charlotte." She sits in a lab. Jeanine isn't there, because she's obviously infuriates with her mother, not afraid. Another young woman, around twenty, stands in front of her. Her raven black hair is a mass of curls, swept away from her face, which is delicate but firm, with glasses resting on the bridge of her nose. I'm willing to bet that she doesn't need glasses, but like most Erudite, is so desperate to look as smart as they are that she wears glasses without prescription.

This woman would be beautiful if it wasn't for the coldness and cruelty in her eyes, the malice in her voice.

"Always good to see you, Karen," Charlotte says. Again, her heart is pounding, but she remains calm. "I'm guessing you need me to test something?"

Karen's eyes bore into Charlotte's. "Yes," she says. "This contained death." She holds up a vial of only black liquid, and prepares it into a needle and syringe. Charlotte stays where she is, staring.

"Is Erudite any different then when I left it?" she asks casually, and Karen answers once she turns.

"Why shouldn't I tell you? You'll die in a few minutes anyway," she pauses to inject Charlotte, who keeps staring at Karen. "It's indifferent. Sure, Kevin and Marie miss you, but they'll get over it. Transfers are dead to us." Charlotte gasps and grabs her shoulder in pain. "And you'll be dead to Dauntless as well."

As Charlotte grasps various limbs in pain, Karen continues. "The serum injects you with a cancer tumor, a genetically mutated one that travels six inches a second. This is the serum you developed last year that sucks cancer tumors out and puts them into the needle. We're injecting you with your friend Freddie's tumors that we extracted only weeks ago. Too bad he wasn't here too see this."

Charlotte doubles over, takes a few shuddering breaths, then falls off the chair, dead. The real her sits up as the Simulation Karen kicks her body under a table.

I look at Charlotte for answers. She starts right away. "Karen was in charge of tests of the serums we created, and she tested a few serums on me, but only Amity and Candor. She's really quite nice, she came from Amity and carried that self to Erudite four years ago. Kevin and Marie are twins, Marie's my best friend, and Kevin had a crush on me. Freddie's my other friend that was dying from cancer, and got his tumors extracted from my serum two days before initiation started. Anything else?"

I shake my head. "That's it. Do you have any fears that don't end in death?" Most initiates don't know their fears until they face them in a virtual environment, but she might. After all, she does know the proper technique to wash lettuce properly. Charlotte looks at me.

"Not that I know of. Speaking of the simulation, like we've been doing for the last five minutes, can you meet me here after dinner? I want to show you something." I find myself nodding, and Charlotte smiles. "See you then," she says, skipping away like an Amity. Only then I realize something;

I agreed to go on a date with her.


	17. Chapter 17

Chapter 17:

At dinner, I was too nervous of my date with Charlotte to eat much, so I finished early. I look at my watch. It reads 6:45. I wait for a bit longer in silence, then I hear voices outside. I peer outside the door, but it's too dark and I only see two shadowy figures.

"What the hell do you want?" That sounds like Charlotte. She's not speaking quietly, but I know she doesn't want me to hear. She can handle this by herself.

I'm about to walk away when I hear a higher, squeakier voice. "Listen up, Elena. I don't know what game you're playing, but it just got serious. I know you like Four, and you won't get him that easily."

I see the tilt of Charlotte's head and hear the hardening of her voice. "Then let the game begin." She turns and walks toward me. I hurry back to the chair, and Charlotte sits soon after.

"This is what I wanted to show you." She stands, taps the computer a few times, then injects me with a needle.

"We're going into your fear landscape?" I ask. It's odd for an initiate to willingly face their worst fears, and Charlotte is not masochistic.

"God no," Charlotte says, injecting me with a needle after injecting herself. "We technically are, but I altered the settings so it would only stop when I shut it down from the inside. Trust me, I know how."

My vision is blurring, a side affect of the simulation. "Be brave," I say, like I always do. Charlotte smiles boldly, not looking in the least bit scared.

"Aren't I always?" Then the world around me breaks away as the simulation takes us.

She sits tied on a chair again, facing the fear with Lucas Wicket. She says, "This isn't real," and the scene transforms into a field. Flowers dot the green grass, and the sun is blazing. She smiles.

"I just altered the simulation. They're all in my head, so it's like an ultimate Divergent move. Well, if we weren't in a fear landscape." She snaps and a picnic blanket with food appears. "I saw that you didn't eat much, probably out of nerves, so I though a little virtual picnic would be nice." I reach into the bag and pull out a cake. "This is a fake environment, so you can eat what you really can't in reality. You can have sugar, and I," she pulls out a large quart of ice cream that shouldn't have been able to fit in the basket. "Can have ice cream without the classic girl fear of fat."

After we eat, the field and sky disappears, leaving us floating in blackness. She smiles. "What do you want created?"

I speak for the first time in this odd experience. "The Pit? With just us?"

Charlotte smiles, and says, "Is that a question?" I shake my head and she smiles, creating the Pit. We're by the Chasm, the rushing waters flowing rapidly. When I look back at Charlotte, she's making the water dance by tweaking her fingers, and the water that she levitated moves gracefully through the air. When she catches me staring, she makes the water lose shape and fall on my head. I'm soaked. "You can do whatever you want here!" Which that, her figure shimmers, altering slightly, until she looks like a drop-down gorgeous woman. "Now I," she gestures to her body. "Am gorgeous."

I shake my head and imagine her as she truly is. Her image flickers, then changes back. "You already are beautiful."

Charlotte looks shy for the first time. "You, you think I'm beautiful?" I nod. She smiles. "No ones ever said that. They compliment my brain or my bravery or my success. But never my beauty."

"Well, someone should." She laughs, and I have an idea. I imagine the most wonderfully hung imaginable, and Tris pops up. "Charlotte, this is Tris, my girlfriend." Tris smiles, and so does Charlotte.

"I've always wanted to meet you, Tris," she says. "It was very brave of you to do what you did. My mother kept trying to uncover the secret of Divergence, but I knew that you'd get away before she did." Tris looks puzzled, and Charlotte smiles. "Sorry. I'm Elena Embers, but my name before I became Dauntless was Charlotte Matthews. I'm so sorry that your parents were killed in the Dauntless attack. That was all my fault."

Tris smiles. "It's okay. You didn't know what was going on. I've been watching Four over here, and I think you two will be happy together." She turns to me. "What you and I had was special. But we're so far apart now. You and this girl are different, but you have a connection. And I don't want to steal that from you." She kisses me quickly, then pulls away. "I love you, Tobias." Then she shimmers away. The world around us melts away, and we sit in the fear simulation room again. Tris broke up with me.

"I'll leave you alone," Charlotte says. "See you tomorrow." Tris broke up with me. There's only one thing to do now that doesn't involve drinking.

I cry.


	18. Chapter 18

When I was finished crying over Tris, I went to the actual Chasm. The weight of grief and sorrow was pounding against me, suffocating me. No one appreciates anything until it's taken away from them. I grieved over Tris's death, but I knew she still loved me, and we'd be together forever. Now she's gone forever, and though she loves me, we're not together anymore.

As I sit by the Chasm, the river spray cold against my bare ankles, I hear a voice. "Hey," Charlotte says softly. "I know you probably want to be alone, but I need to talk to you." She sits down by me. "Ever since that zip lining day, I've always viewed you as a close friend, one a few years older then me." I feel like laughing, then sobbing. Tris said that, but i was only two years older then her. I'm four years older then Charlotte.

She faces me, and I see her cheeks wet, too, though she never met Tris. Was she crying for me?

"When I saw you kiss Tris, I knew that I liked you. As bad as I feel for being the main reason you two are not together, I know that I have feelings for you."

I feel myself stiffen. I can't be in another heartbreaking relationship. "But why me?" I ask. "Why? You said it yourself, I'm still older then you."

Charlotte looks at me hard. "Age is just a number, Four," she says and I don't know if she's using my name to pun her age theory, or if she's being ignorant. "Like how shit is just a word, how Jeanine Matthews is just a name," her face softens. "And love is just an emotion. It's a very rare and strong one, but not one to push away. I'm not saying that you like me, Four, but you have the right to know how I truly feel about you." She stands to walk away, but I grab her arm and wrench her back.

"Don't go," I say, a lightbulb illuminating my brain with an idea. "Have you ever kissed a boy before?"

Charlotte straightens up and looks prim, like an Erudite, like her mother. "Love is useless. It's an emotion beings read too much into, useful only when to create offspring."

I smile. "Well, what you do is the male caresses your hair," I slide my hand down her silky hair, tousled by movement. "Then, we hold hands and smile into eachothers eyes," I grab her hand and smile, consuming the life in her eyes, that sparkle that never dies out. "Then after a while, I grab your face gently," my hands frame her face, her pretty and delicate features that in an instant could turn evil. "And we kiss."

Our faces slowly move toward one another, the space between us lessening until it is nothing. Her lips are soft, and so are her cheeks. Sometime during the kiss, her hand caresses mine. It's already rough and callused from weeks of Dauntless training, but I couldn't wish for them to be any softer.

She grins. "Was that your last kiss in two years?" She sees the sour look on my face, then laughs, sounding lighter than ever since Benjamin's death. "What? You're rusty. Let me show you how it's done." She brushes her lips against mine, becoming firmer by the second until she's almost pushing me down.

When we break apart, she falls into my arms and we embrace, her laughing. A small Dauntless child is walking by, no older hen seven years old. She gapes at us, and Charlotte says, "Beat it, kid, or I'll make you." The kid runs away, and we continue, our lips brushing occasionally. After a few minutes, she says, "We should probably go back before rimjob Raina finds us and thinks we're mental."

So I walk her back to the transfer dormitories, and she slips in, no one catching her. A few initiates are still out, but it doesn't matter until tomorrow if they're not there.

On the way back to my apartment, I stop by the Chasm. Something's on the ground, so I bend down to pick it up. It's a bandage from a tattoo shop. There's ink stuck to it, making an amorphous shape. I throw it into the Chasm and walk away.

I hear footsteps behind me and freeze. I would ask 'Who's there?' but it would make no difference and only exploit fear and uncertainty. Instead, I turn and walk away. Something hard hits my head, and my vision blurs. I try to turn, but I'm already pinned against the wall. A hand grabs my head and bangs it against the wall. As I fall, I see Charlotte coming in and punching my attacker. I feel hot blood on my skin, then everything goes black.


	19. Chapter 19

Chapter 19:

I wake to the sound of shoes slapping the tiles beneath me. In in the infirmary, but I can't remember why. A woman with blonde hair and kind eyes looks at me. "How are you feeling, Four?"

I can barely see because everything's a blur. My head's throbbing in the general direction of where the bandage on my forehead is. I feel weak and dizzy, I should say. But I don't.

"Fine," I say, sitting up. That makes me dizzier, so I slump back into the bed. "What happened?"

"You were attacked by the Chasm," the woman says. "You have a major concussion, but luckily no brain damage. Though with from the looks of those wounds, you will have to take a short questionnaire." I sigh, but obey. "Name?" she asks.

"Four."

"Age?"

"Eighteen."

"Current faction?"

"Dauntless." This was ridiculous. These are easy questions with easy answers. Yet the nurse purses her lips.

"I'll be back. Don't try to get off the bed or even sit up," she instructs before rushing out of the room. I look at my watch. It's seven in the morning. I must've been attacked last night and been out all night. Or for days.

The nurse comes back. "She doesn't walk to me, but to another nurse. "We have a Level 2 anesthesia here," she says. "Can you get Doctor Horace while I make sure he's okay?" The other nurse trots away, and mine comes back. "Who are the current transfer initiates?" she asks. It's odd.

"Tris, Christina, Will, Peter, Al, and Molly." It was easy. The most memorable initiates had passed, leaving the other two behind. Or was it three? My head's throbbing to much to think.

The other nurse comes back with a man in a white coat that flows to his ankles. He's plumb with a bald patch on top of his head, and the remaining hair was grating. "Bring in that girl, Lauren." Lauren comes walking in, her face as pierced as ever.

"Hi, Four," she says. Nothing new pops up, like I can tell the nurses are hoping. Lauren looks at her watch. "Damn it!" she says. "Gotta go. I'm getting paid ten credits to scare the shit outta some show off." She dashes away, and the nurses and doctors huddle together.

Person after person comes in, hoping to spark a memory that I don't already have. No one does. They tell me to wait, so they can find another person to try to remind me of the present. So I wait.

Behind the tin walls, I can hear voices. Girl voices. One sounds light and happy, like a young Amity, the other confident and smart.

"Elle," the Amity girl says. "It's okay. He'll remember everything. Besides, what's there to lose? It's not like you had any emotional memories."

"I know," says the voice of the girl described as Elle. "But it's just…hard to explain."

Then a medic's voice comes in. "Miss, will you come with me? You may be a good hope." He pulls her in, and I get a good look at her. She has brown hair that's almost black. Her face is pretty, but maybe only to my eyes, as she looks, desperate and afraid.

"Hey," she says softly. It's the girl with the Erudite voice, the one that's cool and calculating. Her face is distantly familiar. "Could we be alone for a bit?" she asks the medics. They nod and file out of the room. She looks into my eyes.

"I'm supposed to activate a memory, but I can tell you have one. But the old You knew that I wouldn't give up trying to get a Candor to shut up." That makes me smile. "This might help, she says, showing me her silver watch.

Behind the face is a picture. It's after one of Dauntless' famous zip lining trips. I'm carrying her bridal-style, and she's laughing, her face red. And suddenly, I remember.

Thousands of feelings come rushing toward me at once. Grief, sorrow, pain, misery, and fear. But then there's other ones the past two years have brought me, happier ones. Happiness, laughter, excitement, fun, and love, the most powerful feeling of all that is overwhelming, too unbearable to push away that I allow it to erupt all over me.

"Charlotte," I whisper. She smiles, and I pull her face to mine so our lips touch. I know I shouldn't, but I can't help it. You can't destroy feelings, only bottle them up. Mine are exploding out. I love her. God, I love her.

I love her.


	20. Author's Note

**Okay, so here's the thing. I have already written the entire story Convergent out on my phone. But this website's copy and paste isn't working on my phone, so I'm afraid I have to stop. Of course, you can always view my story on Wattpad. There's a link on my profile.**

**Sorry,**

**-Elena Anselle**


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